Judge me.

Sit higher.

Bear that trident of yours. It seems like a pitchfork.

I see you, High and Mighty.

I won't bow down. I won't look.

No, wait. I should be decapitated for doing so. Forgive me. I believe my pleas fall on ears that don't understand the word - compassion and pity.

I had enough.

I won't bleed. I won't tear.

I am smiling. So there.

Tear me down.

Bring me down.

I won't be your puppet. I'd stand. Loathe me. Hate me. I'd bless you. No, not being cynical. Nor sarcastic. I am being earnest. Honest. Something that might be so foreign to those like you, and I'm sorry you can't understand that.

Missing home.. More than ever. Missing loved ones. Period. Permit me a few minutes to say this - I want to go home. There. Said it.

That'll suffice. For now.

30 days.

Wow. 30 days. Time streaked past.

In this period of time, short as it is, how much have I achieved? Looking back, it seems so long ago that I turn my back and pulled my luggage and walked that stretch of "road" to get to my departure gate, Gate 9, bawling my way there. Meeting nice people along the way, the Singaporean actors at KIA, the nice China ground assistant staff at SIA. The nice Australian next to me on the 7 hour flight.

What have I achieved?






Carried a koala. Fed kangaroos, wallabies. Saw wombats, penguins (in such a dry state), Kookabaru, Albino Peacock, Panther. Petted a baby goat, a doe, kangaroo with the joey in the pouch. Tried Ash Goat Cheese, Cream cheese, Goat milk cheese, Real cheddar (Adventurous of me eh?). Have freshly made dark chocolate melt in the mouth. Saw Adelaide at the highest point, at Mount Lofty. Strolled down the quaint rows of shops in Handorf. Took the wrong bus after being to Ikea, went to Glenelg due to that wrong bus. Had strong cold dry winds blown in my face. Shivered when the sweater was not thick enough. Walked the corridors of the University of Adelaide. Visited the Spencer Wing. Walked the State's Library and Post Office.

Research on equipments for the aged. Learned Referencing. Learned to make unoccupied and occupied beds. Clean dentures and another classmates' teeth. Had my own teeth brushed by another person. Shown how to manuover a person correctly. Taught Manual Handling. Used a lifter. Learned CPR. Learned Senior first aid. Finishing assignments before the dateline. Got used to the various accents of lecturers and classmates. Waking up for classes. Honing non-existent writing skills. Learned how to shower a person, dress them. Learned to aid them with their ADLs.

Decorated my rooms. Resorting to handwash after awhile. Took buses (Something avoided at all cost back home! Oh, the irony!) Bought things using another currency (Had to steel myself from coverting back to ringgits. Got used to the times the shops are opened (Till 1600 everyday except Friday that is till 2100. For someone who have shopping malls opened till midnight back home, and have places like Xiang Xiang, I'm so NOT used to it!) Learning how to scrimp more than ever, more than back home) Learned a NEW language! (Still in progress!) Stood on my feet for nearly 8 hours at my Orientation to my work site. Had the worse first experience at a Residential Home. Had an uplifting, rejuvenating visit to a Senior Day Center in a scenic place a tad far from the city. Learned the "tricks" (better ways, no shortcuts, mind you) of the trade while at work site Orientation. Learned how to empathize correctly, healthily.

Eating meals. (Yea, very significant for me! Three meals) Got sick on the first week. Had excruxiatiing cramps (yet again). Attending mass at another church other than St.Joseph's or St.Peter's. Had blistered foot from work, walking. Spotted wild koalas and A KANGAROO at Morialta Reservoir Park right across the road of my school yesterday when John, my English lecturer decided we take a walk there. Went to the First falls.

4 paragraphs and I'm still not done. Memories are gushing at me, filling up my head. The list goes on and on.

I'm still awestruck at how much I've learned, how much I've achieved. Learned alot about people, about different cultures, about relationships, about languages, about my career. And most definitely, about myself.

Inevitably, I miss home, so much. My mummy, my daddy, that not so little brother. My grandparents. My mamak, my papak. My COUSINS! My close friends. I miss my nephew, Dylan!! I miss them so much it literally aches physically (I kid you not) I'd admit and say that the first two weeks back, especially the nights were the hardest. I even miss the food so much. Craved so much for my favorite mini foochow burgers, popiah, kway teow, fish and alot more. I miss the places I go at times, I realize I've taken forgranted the simplest things back home like having my own bathroom. Texting whenever I want back home, call when I want. Now, phone calls, MSN, emails, and texts are what that keep me sane. Lord knows how I can stand not having have to hear my parents, my nephew.. and a few close friends! I can't bear really.

Sighs.

South Australia, Adelaide. I've come to like it. I anticipate what the future, what tomorrow may brings for me. I can't say that I'm the same girl who packed her bags and left that little town a month back, I wouldn't say so. I believe, I'm different now? In a few aspects perhaps.

I still am lost, I'm still searching.

A new chapter.


A new entry.

Turn the page, won't you? I believe, it is now, pages, not just a page.

Counting today, shy of five days, I’d be here in the driest state of the driest continent of the world for nearly a month. Yes, time has once streaked past me, as always. The days have been days of lessons, new experiences and self searching. Arriving here on a blustery Monday morning and met with a 12ºC weather and strong winds that literally blew me off balance after nearly 7 hours of flight was, well, unexpected, very unexpected if I’d say so myself. Seeing Flinders Range while thousands of feet above the ground was relief. I was actually glad knowing that I’d land not long. Before the flight, during the flight, met a few people, even actors. (Another story for another day, I believe. Hehe) The flight was emotional draining. I cried like some blubbering fool from the departure gate in KIA until I was well above the night skies. It was hard. Leaving home, leaving things behind. Funny, now when I think back on it, I find myself aching so much yet glad that I’m doing my best to look forward now. When I reached here, I went to my room, (fondly referred to know as my abode, for me the hermit) with Gerard in a backpack, two luggage and two boxes on my floor of my room strewn, it was just overwhelming. I had to sit down on the floor and take a few deep breaths, yes, I was that distraught. Now, it’s a place where I come back to and yea, practically spend most of my time in.

Days past, got used to the UNPREDICTABLE weather, the people, the mealtimes, the meals (yes, I eat and I’m missing food back home! Sighs.), lessons, sleeping times (still can’t sleep as much as I like), the place, the culture, using the currency (I do covert, rule number one, never covert all the time, else you’d be spending time counting more in your head than actually buying anything). Orientation was very educational and helpful, learned a lot of things of this place that I’ve come to like, the somewhat laidback feeling I find comfortable. I learned how to do A LOT of things I won’t be bothered to do back home, for example, BANKING (those that know me know how I can’t stand the whole hassle, but alas, I have to do it here myself, lessons, lessons, inevitable) and TAKING THE BUS! (Still not very used to the system, but hey, I’m getting there, give me time, I’ve been here for less than a month, cut me slack!) Those two are but a few things I’ve come to do myself.

Friends, yes, I’ve found a few. Quite a few I’d say. My batch, C9 is but a batch so varied in age, religion, race, culture. How so one asks? Well, we come from four different countries - China, Malaysia, The Philippines and Poland. A quick run through, Susie and Jackie are from China. Jovylyn, Romar, Laarni, Johnry, Michelle (the last three are cousins) are from the Philippines. Aga (her real name is really hard to spell and pronounce, so Aga it is) is from Poland. Last but not least, us, Malaysians, we are all Sarawakians (Yay! The Land of the Hornbills!) just that we’re all from different towns. Jeffrey is from Sibu. Suneeta is from Miri. Yieng Hung and Allan are from Sarikei. Joyce, Marilyn and I are from Kuching! And that’s just about our nationalities. (Perhaps I’d have another post just to describe them?)

Classes. What can I say? I’ve learned so much, and yes, it is not what I thought it’d be. I learned a lot about myself, my capabilities as well, and I love my classes so far. Classes are from 0900 to 1630 from Monday to Friday (except Tuesday which is until 1830, for English Class) Practical as well, I enjoy them. Tiring, but I’m amazed at how I find myself actually eager to learn. I’ve been to a few Nursing homes already, Parklyn, Aldgate Senior Day Center and today, Ananda.

So much learned in such a short span of time, that it’s mind boggling. Emotions, abundant if I’d say so myself.

A lot of things, if I were to really give a blow by blow account, that would just be too tedious for me and to be read, no?

More soon.

Teddy misses home..